The bong hit heard ’round the world

Sticking with the whole pool analogy, I would like to stick to the shallow end until I find some sort or niche. Speaking of pools, what’s with this whole Michael Phelps ‘youthful indiscretion’ fiasco. Where exactly is the news in this? “TWENTY-THREE YEAR OLD TAKES A BONG HIT AT PARTY!!” congratulations, you just broke watergate.

And don’t try and give me the role model speech. Mike Phelps isnt Ghandi, he doesn’t help the poor or free the oppressed, he swims fast. People don’t look up to him for his character, they think he looks good in a speedo. I don’t give two shits how many gold medals he has drapped around his neck and the truth is, if he was born in Romania neither would you. Most of us have as much to do with Phelps’s victories as we do with the outcome of the Trojan War. So stop making this kid out to be some all American, Johnny Unitas poster child and let him rock some ganja if he wants. We all care WAY too much about our celebrities’ personal lives, and I’m sure most everyone is aware of this problem. I have the solution and it involes not giving news like this priority on every major network. But what do I know?

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